“I Do” Not Waste My Time With Video Games

“I Do” Not Waste My Time With Video Games

Everyone has seen the less than traditional proposals that all too often involve the cliche Jumbotron, the ring in a glass of champagne that doesn’t turn into a Three’s Company episode, or my favorite from the Vietnamese highlanders, the Hmong, where the man simply finds the woman he wants, chains her up for two days without her family finding her, and by tribal law she has by default agreed to marriage.

"I Do" Not Waste My Time With Video Games

Game challenges suitor to win his lady’s heart

Confessed passionate gamer EquinnoxX recently hacked the Nintendo game Contra (by Konami) in order to win the heart of his girlfriend and allow her to win the ring that accompanied victory and finishing the game. It’s an odd choice of game, as when Contra was released at the height of the Cold War it proved as difficult to win as it was for Ronald Reagan and George Herbert Walker Bush to remove Daniel Ortega from power in Nicaragua. Only the collapse of the Soviet Union and its funding of the strongman succeeded in accomplishing his removal. Ironically, without Konami producing Contra II, Ortega returned to Nicaragua and recently his party granted a concession to the Chinese for the building of a canal to rival Panama’s in spite of sovereign, economic, and environmental concerns.

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“I bought Contra, dumped the ROM, hex edited the file, flashed it to a new ROM chip and soldered it all back together.” Try to tell me he’s not a romantic soul after having read that line from his Reddit thread that described the process.

Do gamers make good lovers?

“I had very little knowledge of how the innards of a Nintendo worked before this. I had done basic electronic fixing/modifying/hacking before but that’s about it. It was trial and error all the way and I learned a lot. Of course the reference library that is the internet helped too!” I hope for his fiance Amy’s sake he has a willingness to explore female anatomy and the workings of the female body as much as he’s explored the innards of his Nintendo.

Don’t worry Quinn (the game modifier’s real name), that stuff is on the internet as well, and when you download the Kama Sutra app for iOS or Android you will be able to thank technology for your honeymoon as well as your proposal.

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While studying economics, Brendan found himself comfortably falling down the rabbit hole of restaurant work, ultimately opening a consulting business and working as a private wine buyer. On a whim, he moved to China, and in his first week following a triumphant pub quiz victory, he found himself bleeding on the floor based on his arrogance. The same man who put him there offered him a job lecturing for the University of Wales in various sister universities throughout the Middle Kingdom. While primarily lecturing in descriptive and comparative statistics, Brendan simultaneously earned an Msc in Banking and International Finance from the University of Wales-Bangor. He's presently doing something he hates, respecting French people. Well, two, his wife and her mother in the lovely town of Antigua, Guatemala. <i>To contact Brendan or give him an exclusive, please contact him at [email protected]</i>
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