Interview with Hunter Biden’s Crack Dealer Spider Cuz: “Hunter Gave Me A PPP Loan For CRACK”.

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At the Pulitzer prize winning Stonk Market, we will go to every length to extract the best and most important information possible for our consumers in the name of journalism. Which is why we tracked down, and were able to secure an interview with Hunter Biden’s former crack dealer, Spider Cuz.

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Disclaimer: This is a satirical article.

Interview With Hunter Biden's Crack Dealer

TSM: Thank you for sitting down with us Spider Cuz, as Hunter Biden’s former crack dealer you must know you are one of the most high profile crack dealers.

Spider Cuz: “I don’t see myself that way, Hunter Biden was just another fiend coming for his fix, more money than most, but that’s it.”

TSM: How did your relationship with Hunter Biden start?

Spider Cuz: “We met at a strip club for transgenders in Brooklyn, I was smoking crack on the floor when asked for a hit.”

TSM: How were you paid for the crack, how much was Hunter buying at a time?

Spider Cuz: “With Hunter he paid me several ways, more often than not he paid me in Dogecoin. However I know he has struggled with money so he often had to pay me with fellatio, used cars. He even got his dad, the fucking President, to approve me a PPP loan for $400k for my crack business. We legal now.”

This post first appeared on The Stonk Market

Disclaimer: This is a satirical article.