The situation in the Gulf of Mexico just got worse. The Mexican government has been attempting to put out the massive fire, however early in the hours of July 5th, they were unable to continue spraying water after all pumps were suddenly turned off and computer systems were replaced by a screen demanding a cryptocurrency ransom for normal system functions to be restored.
The Gulf of Mexico Fire: Fireboats Hit By Ransomware
“Hello. We have hijacked your systems with our Ransomware, your tools will be unavailable until 100 Bitcoins are sent to our wallet. If you do not provide the ransom by next week, we will brick all of your systems which will make this tedious process much harder.”
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The Mexican Government claims they have no intention of paying the ransom, and have actually traced the hack back to Russia. The Government says they will be sending a team of Mexican Marines and Cartel members because the cartel members actually have more advanced military tracking technology than the marines.
This post first appeared on The Stonk Market
Disclaimer: This is a satirical article.