Aurora James has had quite a week, after making headlines as the designer behind Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez’s Met Gala, ‘Tax the Rich’ gown.
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Disclaimer: This is a satirical article.
Aurora James Tests Positive For COVID
In an interview with CNN on Tuesday, James explained that she and AOC had followed each other’s’ work for years—and the collaboration seemed natural.
Unfortunately, despite their meteoric rise together, the duo looks to be feuding, as James recently tested positive for COVID-19 and believes New York’s Democratic Governor to be the cause.
Reports have surfaced suggesting that prior to fitting sessions, Ocasio-Cortez, spent a week jet-setting the country, hopping from show to show with Limp Bizkit. To make matters worse, it is believed that she intentionally misled James regarding her whereabouts, after she requested AOC quarantine before their meeting.
James was initially tipped off by the marks on AOC’s body, which she now believes to be from moshing at underground Limp Bizkit shows.
“It just seems unlikely,” James explained, “that she got them while quarantining beforehand like we agreed upon. And with the way she was relentlessly coughing, wheezing, all of that—I… I just feel betrayed. And now, I truly, fear for my life as well as the future of the State.”
We reached out to Ocasio-Cortez for comment, but her camp said she was not taking questions at this time.
This post first appeared on The Stonk Market
Disclaimer: This is a satirical article.