Rob Ford Admits Illegal Drug Purchases, Remains Defiant

Ford ResponderEME / Pixabay

Rob Ford, the embattled Toronto mayor and plus-sized buffoon, has vowed to remain the largest city in Canada’s mayor despite bringing the city into disrepute with his manic and generally deplorable behavior.

Rob Ford did a good job as mayor

I’m certainly not without sin, but I have no trouble casting stones at a man who has made a mockery of his city and himself. That said, in recent public opinion polls most Toronto citizens believe that he’s done a good job during his reign as mayor.

Yesterday, during a heated city council meeting, Ford admitted that as mayor he’s purchased illegal drugs on numerous occasions. After a long pause when Councilor Denzil Minnan-Wong asked him if he had bought illicit narcotics in the past two years Rob Ford was succinct: “Yes I have.”

Rob Ford maintains that he is not an addict, and that he only smokes crack when in a “drunken stupor.” Genius. But to show just the size of the stones this man clearly has, he emphasized yesterday that he is a “positive role model for kids who are down and out.” Wow. Ford then turned defiant when asked to step down from his job as mayor.

“I’m most definitely keeping this job,” he said. “I am not leaving here. I’m going to sit here and going to attend every meeting.”

Rob Ford’s job still safe?

While the video of Rob Ford smoking crack and a later-surfacing video of him ranting like a lunatic clearly under the influence of something are damning and embarrassing, they are not enough to charge Ford criminally. Without those charges, it will be next to impossible to move Rob Ford out his job. And moving Ford is a daunting challenge given both his girth and stubbornness.

“Together we stand to ask you to step aside and take a leave of absence,” Councilor Jaye Robinson said, reading the open letter that was signed by 41 of 43 Councillors. While the crowd erupted in applause, at the end of the day, it means very little if Ford continues his stance of defiance.

“We can’t tell him what to do. Only the electorate can tell him what to do,” said Rob Ford ally¬†Councilor Giorgio Mammoliti . “Most of us that care have already spoken to the mayor or relayed it to the mayor’s family. I think that’s what’s needed. The rest is up to the electorate.”

Rob Ford is not only going nowhere, he pledges to seek reelection and he might just win.

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About the Author

Brendan Byrne
While studying economics, Brendan found himself comfortably falling down the rabbit hole of restaurant work, ultimately opening a consulting business and working as a private wine buyer. On a whim, he moved to China, and in his first week following a triumphant pub quiz victory, he found himself bleeding on the floor based on his arrogance. The same man who put him there offered him a job lecturing for the University of Wales in various sister universities throughout the Middle Kingdom. While primarily lecturing in descriptive and comparative statistics, Brendan simultaneously earned an Msc in Banking and International Finance from the University of Wales-Bangor. He's presently doing something he hates, respecting French people. Well, two, his wife and her mother in the lovely town of Antigua, Guatemala. To contact Brendan or give him an exclusive, please contact him at theflask@gmail.com