Most investors are aware that Tesla Motors Inc (NASDAQ:TSLA) is a highly polarizing stock. But it seems that the company itself has brought the crazy conspiracy theorists out of the woodwork. A group calling itself Phase 2: Project Axciom suggests that Tesla has bribed lawmakers and is involved in organized crime. Well hold the presses.

Tesla Motors TSLA Netflix

Anti-Tesla group strikes again

Months ago, a group circulated flyers around San Francisco with these same sorts of claims. Now what’s probably the same group calls Tesla’s car a “toxic Tesla crime-mobile” and claims that it is “full of lies and cancer causing [sic] materials.” The group also accuses some of the most popular media outlets of owning Tesla shares and perhaps trying to pump up the automaker’s stock.

One of those on the list is Autobloggreen, which states that its workers aren’t even allowed to own Tesla stock.

Tesla accused of bribing lawmakers

The group suggests that five senators, eight “Senior Agency Staff” members and two “White House Staff” members were all bribed to allow Tesla’s cars on the street. They also claim that some of the automakers workers have seen “organized crime on a first hand [sic] basis.”

In addition, the group points to the handful of fires and accidents involving Tesla cars and claims that no one wants them except the company’s investors and “douche-bag surgeons who then crash them and kill people.”

Flyers handed out

In April, after circulating the initial flyers, the group posted on the so-called Somo News blog some information it claims to have fact-checked. The group points to all the media comments calling it a bunch of “crack-pots” (and the same sorts of comments are being made now, obviously).

The post states, “Lithium ion batteries blog up if they get wet or bumped.” Seems like a strange comment to make since a lithium battery inside a car is certainly going to be bumped around quite a bit. The group adds that Tesla’s cars have more than “7000 chances of having a catastrophic fire” because its battery packs have over 7,000 batteries in them. In addition, it points to “tens of thousands of lithium ion battery fires and explosions.”

And the list goes on and on. Honestly I feel bad for anyone who’s taking this group seriously. A closer look at the supposed list of “proof” via the links provided at the bottom of the page shows only links to direct pages on specifically anti-Tesla websites or blogs. The other links to more reputable sites like the Los Angeles Times and the Government Accountability Office take you to their home pages rather than any specific story about Tesla. This suggests there’s nothing to find on these websites and that they’re merely fluff links provided in an attempt to give the group’s claims some legitimacy.

Below is the full statement:

THIS IS YOUR TESLA MOTORS INTERVENTION:

BORN IN BRIBES AND CORRUPTION, FORGED IN FIRES, AND MORE FIRES, AND STILL MORE FIRES AND SOME EXPLOSIONS, THE TOXIC TESLA CRIME-MOBILE THAT YOU ARE DRIVING IS FULL OF LIES AND CANCER CAUSING MATERIAL. WE WANTED YOU TO KNOW THAT THE LOOK ON PEOPLE’S FACES, WHEN YOU DRIVE BY, MAY NOT BE ENVY BUT, RATHER: DISGUST!

BRIBED: 5 Senators, 8 Senior Agency Staff and 2 White House Staff.

Why do “YOU” want to be a part of that? Let’s examine the facts and details …

… Some of the people involved have worked at Tesla and claim to have witnessed: “Organized crime on a first hand basis.”

Two members have subscriptions to the Axciom Privacy Abuse database. They thought: “hmmm, why not use something evil for good purposes by helping to inform, and save, hapless Tesla owners who got screwed during the information Green-wash!”

Members found out that major media outlet owners (Engadget, Google, AUTOBLOG GREEN, Gizmodo, Jalopnik, etc.) had stock in the Tesla and battery cartels and, thus, covered up the first investigation results.

They want to clean the market more completely than an email “accident” on an IRS Hard Drive.

Does that sound like a big project? It isn’t! After nearly a decade and billions of dollars of your tax money, Tesla has only sold .5% of the cars that their competing electric, or gas cars have sold for the same investments in time and dollars. Nobody wants a Tesla except Tesla’s investors and douche-bag surgeons who then crash them and kill people. So, relatively speaking, there are not that many people to hunt down.

Tags: