Google Breeds Upstart Paleontologist

Updated on

While mastodons haven’t roamed the earth since Pleistocene times, that is around 10,000 to 11,000 years ago, their teeth do show up in Michigan a few times each year – just ask nine year-old Philip Stoll. Last summer, the youth was strolling alongside a creek in his hometown when he stepped on something that he found “pretty cool.” Following his discovery the youth returned home with the six-peaked object of around eight inches.

What is it?

Proud of his find he showed his mother Heidi, a mother that he presumably just calls “mom.”

“I was holding it in my hands for a few minutes and then it gave me the creeps so I put it down on the desk,” she told CNN. “It looked like a tooth. It looked like there was something like gum tissue, a little bulgy thing around the top.”

Unlike the elephant, the mastodon which is also closely related to the wooly mammoth, is not particularly bright according to herpetologist James Harding of Michigan State University. “It is a great reminder of what used to roam the country,” he said. “It most likely got stuck in a swampy area and drowned.”

Google vs. Bing

Mr. Harding shared these thoughts with the Stoll family after they Googled “large tooth object” and found the professor residing nearby along with his contact information.

Mastodons, like wooly mammoths, had trunks, curved tusks, shaggy fur and lived in herds. Mastodons, however, were in possession of stronger more muscular builds with shorter legs in order to support their body structure.

While shows like MTV’s Ridiculousness feature the random nonsense that comes from “Binging” (the use of Microsoft’s Bing) certain word pairings, Google still finds answers. In this case an answer that, at present, has Master Stoll considering a career in paleontology following his discovery of a rare creek-side prize of the ages.


Leave a Comment