Santa Is Magic, PlayStation Transforms Itself Into A Block Of A Wood With A “D*ck Pic”

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Santa Is Magic, PlayStation Transforms Itself Into A Block Of A Wood With A “D*ck Pic”

Not a so much a “Dick Pic” in the Brett Favre or Anthony Weiner sense, but rather the hand-drawn c*ck and balls that those pesky little helpers at the North Pole are known to draw on some of the toys meant for “all the boys and girls.”

Santa has a twisted sense of humor

A nine-year old Massachusetts boy, Scott Lundy, erupted in joy on Christmas morning Friday when he ripped the wrapping paper off the only gift he asked for this Christmas, a PlayStation 4, and saw him exclaiming, “YES THIS IS THE BEST CHRISTMAS EVER DAD CAN WE SET THIS UP NOW?”

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That unbridled joy, however, was short-lived. When the box was opened there was no PlayStation 4, rather, there was a block of wood roughly shaped like the best selling game console. To add insult to injury, the block of wood featured a picture that included a picture of the giver of the gift and the inscription, ”From cock and balls with love.”

Now, I’m not sure that young Master Lundy, at nine years old, still believed in Santa upon requesting the gift, but if I was his parents I would certainly forgive him if his next exclamation was, “WHAT A PISSER.”

I stopped believing in Santa at quite a young age and hangovers at a far too young of an age. I figured, with regards to the latter that, when I stopped believing that Santa was real he stopped bringing me gifts and logically thought the same would apply to hangovers. Somewhat surprisingly it did in fact work, at least until I moved to a town of drunken reprobates that I count as my friends. Or perhaps it was the fact that most bars here serve Healey’s as their house gin.

Either way, before reading this story, I once again believed in Santa.

Target responds with good cheer, new PlayStation

Instead of suggesting that perhaps young Scott Lundy did something “naughty” after being determined “nice” during the delivery process,  the Target store in Saugus, Mass. did the right thing.

“They not only gave us a new game system but they also gave us a $100 gift card as well as an additional game that the original game that was supposed to be in the box. Couldn’t have been any kinder,” said Scott’s step-mother Kristin. In case you’re curious, the additional game was The Uncharted Collection.

“We never like to disappoint our guests and are thankful for our store team’s quick response to make things right,” said Lee Henderson with Target Communication.

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While studying economics, Brendan found himself comfortably falling down the rabbit hole of restaurant work, ultimately opening a consulting business and working as a private wine buyer. On a whim, he moved to China, and in his first week following a triumphant pub quiz victory, he found himself bleeding on the floor based on his arrogance. The same man who put him there offered him a job lecturing for the University of Wales in various sister universities throughout the Middle Kingdom. While primarily lecturing in descriptive and comparative statistics, Brendan simultaneously earned an Msc in Banking and International Finance from the University of Wales-Bangor. He's presently doing something he hates, respecting French people. Well, two, his wife and her mother in the lovely town of Antigua, Guatemala. <i>To contact Brendan or give him an exclusive, please contact him at [email protected]</i>

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