Proving that truth is stranger than fiction, Vladimir Putin is looking forward to working with President Trump.

Congrats To The Donald Trump, You've Got Putin's Vote

Donald Trump can see Russia from his backyard

Oh wait, that’s the other wingnut that so captivated Americans during an election cycle not so long ago. I’m not entirely sure that this piece will be published as Valuewalk does do its best to remain apolitical, but I have to try.

Best I can tell the only difference between Sarah Palin and Donald Trump when it comes to foreign policy is that I’d have sex with one.The other knows they have no idea what they are talking about but promises to hire “the best” to get them up to speed after election.

I jest, I wouldn’t have sex with her with your penis if only because I’m a Catholic and wouldn’t want to run the risk of having to answer the question of what comes next in the perverted Fibonacci sequence of naming children that starts with: Bristol, Trig, Willow, Piper, Track…

But, I understand Trump’s appeal, given the choice of a neurosurgeon who doesn’t believe in evolution, a Canadian whose convinced himself he’s a naturalized citizen of the United States and shuts down the government for fun…I digress.

Trump is right. Yes, we’re a nation founded on religious persecution and immigration but we don’t need that anymore. Who needs the First Amendment when the Second Amendment can shoot 30 rounds through it without reloading? The Second Amendment is such a badass that it can still comfortably order Chili’s “Awesome Blossom” off the menu.

All this said, am I the only one disheartened by Vladimir Putin wanting Donald Trump as the next President of the United States?

I won’t go so far as to say that relations between the United States and Russia are at an all-time low, but I’m comfortable saying that they’re close.

This is a man that hates the United States, is presently threatening a NATO ally (Turkey), annexed Crimea, and worst of all, believes that suspended FIFA chief Sepp Blatter deserves a Nobel Peace Prize. (Short piece, short list)

The interests of the United States and those of Russia are very close to diametrically opposed. A ringing endorsement of Donald Trump should cause his supporters pause if only because….oh wait, I get it now, Putin isn’t a Muslim.

Putin’s Trump support in his words

Before you skip ahead to the comment section of this piece and label me a communist anti-gun liberal who opposes….

I’m not. I’m a pro-choice Republican whose been thrown out the window of a Humvee for asking the party, “How can you afford the gas for this thing?” I’m a former supply-side Economist whose place in the world is comparable to exhuming Jack Kemp for a dinner party conversation.

I simply have a problem with the ungodly love affair between a strongman and a demagogue that is clearly emerging. A strongman whose inner circle is made up of oligarchs and a man who can’t settle on a mail-order bride is terrifying to me. These two go together like cocaine and chocolate; like them individually, sure, but together? Not so much.

In a question and answer session that lasted over three hours today, Vladimir Putin spoke to working with the next U.S. President.

Putin promised that Russia will work with “whomever the American voters choose.” However, he made his preference clear if that choice is not Steven Seagal or Roy Jones Jr., it’s Trump

Unabashedly, Putin said of Trump, he’s the “absolute leader in the presidential race.”

And, “He’s a very lively man, talented without doubt.”

Never mind that his inheritance invested in a value sense would see him with considerably more billions.

It’s a love affair. Full stop.

“He’s saying he wants to go to another level of relations, closer, deeper relations with Russia,” Putin continued. “How can we not welcome that? Of course we welcome that.”

And that’s the crux. Geographically, politically and philosophically these two shouldn’t like each other unless they are planning to split the world between them. Never mind that China might struggle with this idea or that Putin invited Kim Jong-un to the Moscow Day Parade this year. It just doesn’t work.

Putin’s agenda in Syria and the great contradiction

Putin’s Russia, and it is Putin’s Russia, has its own agenda. Establish an airbase in Syria to fight ISIS? No, suppression of rebels opposed to the Assad regime? Yes.

But that’s not what he’s saying, wait a minute?

“There is a plan,” Putin said. “In its key aspects, it coincides with the American plan: working on the constitution, preparing elections in Syria and the recognition of their results. But for now we are going to launch strikes and support the Syrian army in its offensive.”

The United States, rightfully, opposes the brutality of the Assad regime whose well-documented brutality has killed hundreds of thousands and led to an exodus of millions of its citizens seeking better lives. Donald Trump seems willing to capitulate on this, but of course, not suffer refugees gladly.

Putin still has Turkey on the brain

Russia continues to call out Turkey for the downing of an Su-24 in Turkish airspace and this isn’t going away anytime soon.

Rhetoric from both sides continues, but Putin’s is a bit odd and borders on fetish. Work with me.

“Life has shown that it is difficult to us, practically impossible, to come to terms with the incumbent Turkish administration,” Putin said. “Even when and where we say that we agree they stab us in the side or in the back, for absolutely unclear reasons.”

That makes sense. The following does not.

“We don’t know that yet,” said Putin, when asked if another party was involved in the decision to shoot down the Su-24…“But if someone in the Turkish government decided to lick the Americans in a particular place, I don’t know if they were acting rightly. I don’t know if the Americans need this.”

Licking aside, Trump and Putin together frighten me.