The Daily Show’s Jon Stewart would like people to leave the “Magnificent, Complicated, Wonderful Story” of the release of Sgt. Bowe Bergdahl positive, uplifting.
At first uplifting, it quickly went downhill from there
When the story was first reported, it was the magnificent story of a solider, held captive by the Taliban for five years, being re-united with his family after several years in captivity. Pressure was further placed on the situation when a secret tape recording surfaced indicating Bergdahl might be slipping into a dire situation and close to death.
What’s the difference between Obama operating outside US jurisdiction with Taliban and BNP operating outside US jurisdiction?
With the potential death of a US solider in the formula, Obama decided to negotiate with Qatar, who negotiated with the Taliban. President Obama is then accused of negotiating with terrorists, but he says that was done outside US jurisdiction by Qatar (which sounds very much like BNP’s defense against the DoJ).
“We negotiated with terrorists,” Jon Stewart says with a smile on his face indicating a punch line to come. “What controversy.”
After showing one Fox News anchor wondering out load if negotiating with terrorists is an impeachable offense, Jon Stewart changes the title of the story to “A Magnificent, Complicated CLOUDED CONTROVERSIAL story.”
“It’s only been 1 ½ days,” Stewart bemoans and he considered the brief time the story remained positive.
Jon Stewart: Hannity is not a negative word that sounds Arabic
Jon Stewart then get’s on a hysterical rant about how Fox News host Sean Hannity purposefully mispronounced the soldiers last name to make it sound more Islamic. “Sean Hannity is not an assHOLE,” Stewart said, attempting to make the derogatory word sound Arabic. “Why would he do that (try and make Bergdahl’s name sound Arbic)?”
Then Jon Stewart comments on the Rose Garden announcement when President Obama trounced on the American stage with the hippie-Taliban hairstyles of Bergdahl’s Idaho parents. “Oh, no,” he said, as video transitions to Fox News correspondents commenting on Bergdahl’s beard and general Taliban appearance. “You don’t have to look like a member of the Taliban,” commented one Fox News host. “Are you out of razors?”
To this a deadpan Jon Stewart shakes his head as if to say, “Ok, his utter ignorance and hypocritical behavior is now on full display.” This sets up the punch line of the entire piece.
“Well that got ugly pretty fast,” Jon Stewart says, as he is about to embark on a classical rank. “First, who the f*ck are you to tell someone how their beard should look if he thinks it will help him get his son back? I don’t want to complicate your hatred of facial hair there, my friend, but my guess is that if you gave Bob Bergdahl a bandana and a duck (like Duck Dynasty), you’d like him just f—ing fine!”